Man on deathbed: “I wish I binged-watched more TV shows”

A short read about consumption and production

Author’s note: I came up with this idea for a post on the bus. My commute to work is my thinking, writing or drawing time (When I’m not aimlessly SM scrolling - I mean SadoMasochistic not Social Media).

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I’m sat on the back seat of the bus like a badboy, pondering, colouring in a random face I’ve drawn previously. I’m at peace, enjoying the scribble noises of the ink markers on the canvas pad, watching the colour fill the space, it’s therapeutic.

I looked up briefly and 94% of the bus were on their phones. The other 4% are snoozing and the 2% are drawing and writing this post (aka me). I don’t mean to sound like I’m better than the others, but I must admit my ego felt a little smug for a split second. In reality, I’m the one who does a lot of scrolling through social media, not as much now as I’ve deleted LinkedIn and Twitter permanently, and deleted the Instagram and Facebook apps from my phone. 

My point in this post is not to delete your social media. But to share my thoughts around producing more and consuming less.

I’m just sharing my experiences here, but if you boil it all down. Ask yourself this: “Does it feel better to be doom scrolling, looking through on social media aimlessly, or does it feel better when you’re lost in the moment, drawing, writing, knitting, video editing or anything else that involves creating?”.

My answer is the latter, and on this occasion on the bus, I was simply colouring in a face that I had drawn previously. I was having a lot of fun, my thoughts slowed down, I wasn’t worrying about anything, I was lost in the act of creating.

The oh-so familiar feeling of doom scrolling, for me anyway, I feel uptight, I feel anxious, I feel empty, I feel like I’m waiting for something to happen and chasing something at the same time. You just get enough out of the experience to keep on scrolling. Ok, you might get something funny or inspirational pop up in your feed, but it’s usually short lived.

Below: A small painting I did to express my doom scrolling frustrations in 2020. Untitled.

Something weird just happened (well, it’s only weird because I was aware that I was doing it) I saved the draft of this post and then ended up checking gmail > checking messenger > checking … Then I caught myself. When I had all of the social media apps on my phone, I’d do this loop so many times. Now it’s time for messenger to be deleted from my mobile. Bye bye, Messenger.

It’s like junk food, if you don’t have it in the house you can’t eat it!

I’ve forgotten where I was…

Ah yes, so, the production of art in my case, is enjoyable for me in and of itself. I’m putting something into the world that wasn’t there before, regardless of whether anyone sees it or if you I to share it, it’s creation in action. It’s a quotidian miracle!

We are the only creatures around that can decide to do something in their minds and then make it a reality. This is bloody amazing isn’t it?! Animals can create what they are instinctively able to do or what they’re trained to do but they can’t create like us.

So go and create for the fun of it, please! I’d rather you stopped reading this now and went and wrote a poem then shared it on social media.

Going back to TV shows, we all love binging series these days. I’m guilty of it too, my latest binge was Fisk, basically an Australian version of The Office but at a probable law firm. Really enjoyed it. But I don’t really talk about it with friends, so what was the point of watching it?

Lol I’m being facetious here, but I’m also thinking through my motives around why I watch shows. Of course I want to be entertained, but sometimes I watch shows in the same vein as soon scrolling. By all means, it’s great to be lost in a great film, but fully watch it and don’t be on your phone at the same time.

The next time you are binging, just see it thought this simple context:

YOU ARE CONSUMING SOMEONE ELSES CREATION

TV is ubiquitous in our lives, a huge part of pop culture, it’s what we chat about. We forget that someone actually created it, obviously we know someone made it, but we forget that we are creators too. We look at these shows in awe like it’s some kind of magic, but they started in someone’s mind too, you and I have minds.

We could make a TV show if we put our mind to it, even if it’s a homemade YouTube series. I say “put our mind to it”, but it’s simultaneously realising that those thoughts and feelings of not being able to create aren’t truth either.

Creation also takes us away from consumerism. We look to spend money as the first port call of being entertained. How about you use your creativity and invent an activity? I’m going off on a slight tangent, but what I’m getting at is that we are all creative beings. So use that faculty a bit more.

Many of us just tend to believe creativity is for ‘creative people’.

I’ll end this post with an apt piece of artwork around consumption, created in 2020. Underneath is the piece is it’s description.

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Deathbed 1 (2020) – 29.7 cm x 42 cm – Brush pen and watercolour paints on white card

This piece is an expression of my frustration of being tethered to the overwhelming amount of series being produced in modern times.

‘Binge watching’ on demand programming is the norm, the trouble with this is you are infinitely chained to watching every subsequent season thereafter. The compounding effect is tremendous, say you watch 10 new shows per year, over 5 years you’ve watched 50 seasons of a show, not to mention seasons 2,3,4,5,6 and 7 of each show. It’s never-ending.

The ball and chain around the man’s ankle represents this trap and the words displayed “Man on deathbed: I wished I watched more TV shows” ironically states that some one would never say this on their deathbed.

Thank you for taking the time to consume my post, now go and produce something like your life depends on it. I’m begging you 🙏